Thanksgiving falls on the last possible date it can, calendar wise, this year. This is a good thing for me personally, because (1) I was out of town five weekends out of six and four in a row this fall, plus a few other weekday trips in between, and (2) I host the family Thanksgiving for my husband’s family. The extra few days will help as I clear the clutter that was not dealt with during that stretch. It’s a large crowd to begin with, and this year we will be blessed because my sister and her family can make the four hour trip to join us. So the tally stands at 28, with varying degrees of hunger, as some will have made one stop already.
While the late date plays in my favor this year, retailers seem a bit nervous about the loss of one weekend for holiday shopping. Many stores are now going to be open on Thanksgiving. While getting my large Diet Coke fountain soda today, (some of us do Starbucks, I do cold fizzy caffeine), the sign at McDonalds read “Yes! We will be open at 7:00 a.m. on Thanksgiving and stay open round the clock through Black Friday.”
And all I could think was, “Those poor people who have to work those days.”
I have to believe that there are many working mothers who will be forced to give up their Thanksgiving, or adjust their plans, because they are required to work on Thanksgiving. Maybe they love their jobs. Maybe it’s a paycheck to provide for their family. Either way, my guess is that these moms would rather not have to work on Thanksgiving.
Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I have so many memories of the lovely meals put on the table by my mother. She never worked outside the home, and planned for days to get everything just right. And of course now I try to meet that standard, despite the fact that I work more than full time. But that is a topic for another day.
It makes me angry thatRead More
“What do you do in your free time? What are your hobbies?”
These are questions that I was asked from time to time when I was raising my son as a single mother and working crazy long and intense hours as an attorney.
I will admit that when asked questions like this, I actually took a few seconds to rack my brain for an answer and then usually stammered out some kind of vague statement about reading . . . (the only things I was actually reading were children’s stories to my son, all kinds of documents and legal writing, and the covers of the tabloid magazines as I stood in line at the grocery store), or working out (by getting up extra early while my son was still sleeping or during my lunch hour in a rushed fashion).
And most of the time, these questions and my inability to provide meaningful answers left me feeling inadequate, like I was a boring individual since I did not have true hobbies or outside interests that I was actively taking part in and enjoying.
During the week, at the end of the day, I rushed home in order to spend some time with my son, eating dinner, going through the night time rituals that accompanied putting him to bed. And there were nights where I did not leave the office and get home until after my son was already asleep and all I had the energy for was a glass of wine while I sat sprawled on the sofa trying to decompress while staring at the television.
On weekends,Read More
This piece was written by Dessa Watson-Ferris. Dessa and I used to work together. I know from first hand experience that she is great at her career, great at mothering, and very vocal in both of those roles. Cynthia
I was at my son’s fall baseball game the other day watching, yet again, the coach signal boys to steal base who were going to be tagged out—or the ball would make it to the base and the glove of the opposing team’s baseman’s—before the boy ever made it to the base. This frustrating scenario has cost our team countless runs over the past few years. Once, I actually asked my son what the other players think. He told me they hate it but have to do what coach says or risk not playing.
A friend, who has coached kiddos young and old, told me that sometimes coaches are encouraged to instruct players to do something knowing they will fail so that they can learn to carry on in the face of failure. I guess I see his point but watching the same “lesson” game after game tasks my patience. As a group, we parents groan in unison and grouse to each other but know we shouldn’t publicly call out the coach – especially the moms. We know our boys want to play. However, at this particular baseball game, I could no longer contain my frustration and yelled out to the coach “WHY DO YOU KEEP SENDING THEM???”Read More
With all of the things we working moms have to do each morning just to get our children up and ready to head out the door, it’s no wonder that we have all had at least that one time where we overlooked some component of our own office worthy appearance. And even if we have had it all together and looked fabulous for a minute or two, the mom thing intervened and we were not looking fabulous anymore.
Here are some tales that working mothers shared:
“I went to work several times with snot and drool, on my shoulder. I would feed and burp the baby before work. Since I never had time to check myself in the mirror before I ran out the door to get to work on time, the result too often was soiled smelly clothes.
One day I knelt down to give my son Colin a hug as I was leaving the house. I get to work and while I am in a meeting, I notice that I have a gooey gummy mass about the size of a baseball on my dress around my knee cap area. My son obviously dropped something gooey on the floor and I knelt on it. After the meeting I went to the bathroom to clean it up and of course had a stain on my dress all day!!” Kathy
“I totally left the house for work one day without makeup and no earrings. It was a terrible. I know it shouldn’t have been, because the way I look shouldn’t affect my confidence, blah blah blah … but it was awful. I don’t wear heavy makeup or anything — always a dewy fresh faced looked — but I felt soooo bare. And, then, no earrings — it was just bad.” L. Nicole
“I once walked out into the hallway without my dress zipped up all the way…my colleague was very nice to notice before I got too far.” Jaqueline
“My routine had always been to come home from work and drop my clothes in a pile in the closet or in a corner after work. Then on the weekend I would pick them up and wash, take to the cleaners or just hang them up. I got on a kick where I wasn’t going to live like such a slob and starting hanging stuff up each day as I took it off . . . until I realized I wore the same thing one Wednesday that I had just worn on Monday!!!! ” JaneRead More
I am a closet gossip website addict. I do not subscribe to or even purchase the various gossip rags, but at night, from my iphone I scroll through people.com, usmagazine.com, radaronline.com and perezhilton.com. If I am missing any other good ones, please let me know.
But lately, more and more, I am disappointed by many of the posts I find on these various sites. Instead of reading about who was fired from a show or movie, who is being cheated on by whom, the latest real housewives snub or scientology conspiracy, over and over again there is a post about the new baby of so-and-so, or the fact that so-and-so is pregnant.
This you call gossip? Even the now rather common (double entendre deliberate) “nip slip” is more interesting.
Do not misunderstand me. I am pleased and happy for every one of these new parents or parents-to-be. New life is a miracle no matter who the parent is.
And if I thought that this new public approbation (see, just because I like gossip rags doesn’t mean I have a limited vocabulary) of movie stars having children would transfer over to an approbation of working mothers having children, especially if the approval came from those working mothers’ employers, I would unquestionably be more supportive. But I still would not consider it good gossip, or honestly, even newsworthy.Read More